April 8th, 2013 by Jan

The yard sale last Saturday was a big success. Super big thanks to Kathy for all her help and support. Also to everybody who came and took things away.

The weather was no great, but we had everything indoors, and we had a pretty good turn out. Even though there is still stuff leftover, a lot of things went out the door, and we put a few bucks in our pocket. It felt good and we were exhausted at days end.

I have to say I was super surprised that something didn’t even get a once over. Our TV for example! I just couldn’t believe that no one even asked about it, it is such a beaut! So on the day after the sale, Ken took some left overs, including the TV to the recycle depot. There is a shelf there for old electronics, and now this gem will join the ranks of landfill.

It’s not that I am attached to the TV – but this particular TV has a story or two, and as it left the house I felt like a piece of Parker history left with it.

Ken already had this TV when we met back in 1982. It was used and unwanted even back then, but served us well as Ken and I both watch a lot of TV.

This is the TV that had apart in my sobriety and made it possible for me to have the great life I have with Ken.

Sure I spent many hours on the couch watching it as I drank, but also this the TV that I poured water down by accident as I was watering the plant that hung above it when we lived in Colorado.

This is the TV that I broke, and because I didn’t know any better back in those days, I almost left the best life I could have imagined because at the time, I didn’t know you could apologize for making a mistake.

I was so sure back then that Ken would want me gone after I broke his TV, that I packed my things and waited for him to come home from work so I could at least say goodbye.

Lucky for me, Ken is Ken. Some say he is the voice of reason and gratefully, I listened and I learned when he told me to just “get it fixed.”

It sounds so silly 30 years later. But, yesterday as this old TV went out the door, I remembered and smiled.
When things are broken or you make a mistake. Say you’re sorry and get ‘em fixed.

Ken gave me my first real lesson in listening and making amends because of this TV.


5 thoughts on “firstlessons

  1. Lan

    Hi Jan,
    I am one of Art’s students in Bellingham. We met at his despedida and had a nice chat about how recovery and Tai Chi dovetail nicely. Since then I finally found your more recent writings on recovery online and just wanted to say it feels like going to a meeting. I get the significance of the TV, and appreciate your sharing the story.
    Blessings on the next phase of your journey. Thank you for being a new part of my recovery.

  2. Kathy

    You’re welcome Jan & Ken ~ it was fun!

    Thank you for sharing this beautiful story. I know I’ve heard it before but it always tugs at my heart strings and then makes my heart soar. It is truly beautiful and I can totally relate in my own way.

    ……frankly, I didn’t even SEE that particular tv but would’ve been all over it if I had. I’m looking around our house and thinking, “wow, I this place reminds me of somewhere else” and then I remember it’s YOUR house because we (I) took home so much of your stuff!

  3. Ken

    I grew up on a ranch and when things broke, you fixed them. Relationships with those you love are MUCH more important (and sometimes harder to fix). Glad I kept Jan and dumped the TV. 🙂


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