My mom could say the oddest things and at times gave me some very interesting â€œmotherlyâ€ advice. Some of it was horrible advice but once in a while she had a gem.
Like if I came to her with a childhood scrape, or mishap; if my feelings were hurt or my world was falling apart, she would sympathize with me, then share this wisdom.
She would promise me that in the future, on my wedding day, I wouldnâ€™t even remember whatever it was that was bothering me that day. She was sure that the skinned knee, pimple on my chin, or the party I wasnâ€™t invited to; whatever it was that was giving me such grief, she knew that all would be forgotten on the glorious day I was to be married.
Basically she was telling me, that whatever I was feeling at that moment, happy or sad, mad or glad, whatever I thought was such a big deal at the time, would pass. This was my mom’s way of teaching me about change.
Of course being a smart-ass, I proved her wrong. On my wedding day, I recounted several bumps, bruises, and broken hearts to her. Things she said I wouldnâ€™t think of on my wedding day. Hah! (That ole, donâ€™t think of a pink elephant trick!) And on that day she smiled at my wit, then gave me a little more advice, â€œDonâ€™t be silly Jan, now go marry that man.â€
Ken comes home tomorrow! Itâ€™s been a very long journey. When I came home from my motherâ€™s funeral, I felt like I was coming back from Mars. Re-entry to earth was hard. I imagine it will be hard for Ken as well. As steady and strong as Ken is, re-claiming ones centre takes time.
I just know, it will be very good to be together again. We live well together. We will do our best to stay present to what is real. We will laugh when we are happy, cry when sadness takes over, we will tell stories, and we will take comfort in a mothers wisdom.