thechangethatisnotchange

December 16th, 2012 by Jan

The only Bridget Jones movie I ever saw was in my head when I read the book. The thing I remember most about the entire story was that she wrote in her journal in a similar way as I have in the past. Bridget did a bit of a check list of her life habits with the hope of seeing change. It looked similar to this…

June 8
Weight – 140
Cigs smoked 4
Drinks consumed 3
Hours exercised 0

June 9
Weight – 139
Cigs smoked 6
Drinks consumed 7
Hours exercised 0

June 10
Weight – 142
Cigs smoked 1
Drinks consumed 1
Hours exercised 2

And on and on it went throughout the year. By the end of the year not much had changed for Bridget Jones. She still struggled with smoking, drinking and her weight. Over the course of the year she had lost and gain the same 20 pounds over and over again, and on Dec. 31st she basically weighed the same as she did on January 1. Still, she spent the entire year freaking out and being all concerned about her weight, and her habits without really changing anything.

What made me think of this was looking out the window yesterday and seeing snow. Its cold here, so I went downstairs to find the flannel lined, super warm jeans I wear each winter, the ones I bought more than 10 years ago.

My heart soared when I put them on and they zipped up easy-peasy. Ten years and running! I am wearing the same size pants and yet… over the course of the entire year, as well as for most of my life, I struggle and worry about my weight and my habits. (the good AND bad ones).

And while in many ways I have grown and learned and changed, the truth is I remain the same in so many aspects. I am happy these pants still fit. I’m disappointed that I still haven’t lost the weight I think I should.

So, as I think about the coming new year, and write out some goals and resolutions, I see that again, they are basically the same as always.
1. Eat better
2. Exercise more
3. Clear clutter
4. Blah, blah, blah…..

Perhaps this is the year my motto needs to be something to do with acceptance. Acceptance and gratitude for the good life I lead. Because like Bridget Jones, as much as I claim to want to do and be different – I haven’t actually changed much in years!

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