The word of the day is coterie (noun) An exclusive circle of people with a common purpose.
The Full Circle, the Roughriders, the folks at the O, my coven, people in the choir, members of a book club; almost everyone has a coterie.
I have several coteries, but as life changes, I am engaging with them less often. So, yesterday, when I went for a walk with a woman I just met, the thought that I hadnâ€™t made a new friend or joined a new coterie in a while crossed my mind.
Now I have to say, I am not lonely or pinning for attention or fellowship, I am quite happy. Still, the combination of the â€œword of the dayâ€ and the thought I had yesterday are worth looking at.
I like how Ken and I live. We have nice rutsâ€¦ er routines and ways. We have good friends and amazing circles;Â some we havenâ€™t seen in years, others we check in with daily.
I know Iâ€™m friendly enough. Iâ€™m able to make friends quite easily but, yesterday was the first time in a really long time I asked someone new to go for a walk, with the conscious mindset to get to know them better â€” to make a new friend.
Being a good friend is not hard â€” you just have to pay attention. Cultivating coteries is good qigong â€” taking effort and time.
When folks tell me they want to learn Tai Chi, they are surprised when I ask them what they are willing to give up in their life to do it. Because to add one more experience, practice, lesson or friend into our already full time lives is hard. Time has to be made, room has to be cleared, effort has to be put in.
I think having coteries is worth the practice.