It’s New Years Day 2023.
I posted my year in review questionnaire yesterday and as I re-read it I realize how repetitive it was from last year and the year before!
I joke that Sisyphus was basically a happy man — doing the same thing over and over again, day in and day out, only because the same ole tends to suit me. I like a routine, a rut, a ritual.
“Always and Never the Same” could be engraved on my headstone. (if I were to have one).
For the most part how I spend my time is the same, day after day. I hike different trails, read different books, eat different food, but when asked what I’m going to do – I usually say, Same ole, knowing I’ll probably read, hike, sew, cook a meal and maybe paint!
I hear you get good at what you practice — well, I’ve gotten good at enjoying the day without too much fanfare. I am happy reading, sewing, hiking, cooking and sometimes painting.
In the days before Covid, I did the same things, only there was less fear and more of a freedom to share with company, community, friends and family.
Then Covid hit the world and we were told to stay home. Stay away. Be careful — stay safe!
I struggled at times with all the restrictions. I was both jealous of and pissed off, at the people who went on about life, socializing and traveling.
But, stay home we did, and time past. It got easier to stay home, to not entertain or have company. I was busy at home and we got very comfortable.
Ken and I are hardly that couple who are joined at the hip, yet we like being together. We are homebodies, introverts, and being retired, we know we can spend the day doing anything we want. So, we do.
We also check in with each other often.
Ken will ask, Are you doing okay?
And, if he goes somewhere he will ask if I want to go as well. Sometimes I ride with him to the building centre and wait in the car for him to get whatever. Often, I say, no.
And, I would ask Ken, do you want to come with me on this chore or join me for a walk? Nope, he would say. However, he often offers to drive, to drop me at a trail head or pick me up at the end of one. He’ll be the one to waits in the car while I go into a store.
The only place I dally now is in the woods. The days of looking around a store, picking shit up and putting it back down are over.
At first it wasn’t so hard as it was different. We were all in the same storm. Now four years in, we are practiced. The habit has been made. I’m still reading, sewing, hiking, cooking and sometimes painting. Ken stays busy as ever with all sorts of projects. That man has a to do list!
The thing is….it works for us. We are happy! We do get out and we do see friends, just not as often. We both belong to community guilds and do service work. It’s just a different comfort now. I’m in touch daily with several friends by text, email or zoom. I enjoy my social media community. I’ve developed a comfortable inner life. Being alone in the woods has become a remarkable joy.
Ken and I are comfortable with our own company and the way we spend our days. While I have no regrets, I was a bit taken back at the repetitiveness of the years review! I used to be cool!
I suppose if I wanted different, I’d do different.
I used to say the quality of your day will make up the quality of your life. I still hold strong to that truth. I also reserve the right to change my mind whenever I want.
But today, I can say I had a great day yesterday and hope to repeat it tomorrow!